Here's your Pizza
by God Emperor Penguin
Summary: The food at Beacon is much like its people: fatty, tasteless, and generally disgusting. So when Cinder decides to order pizza and forgets her wallet, she has to find alternative methods to pay the delivery boy, Jaune.


**Here's your Pizza**

**RWBY**

_Written from the perspective of Cinder Fall_

**Summary: **_The food at Beacon is much like its people: fatty, tasteless, and generally disgusting. So when Cinder decides to order pizza and forgets her wallet, she has to find alternative methods to pay the delivery boy, Jaune._

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><p>The food at Beacon is disagreeable at best.<p>

Looking at my Beacon-issued cafeteria lunch plate, I pushed it away. The turkey slices were fatty and the mash potatoes was tasteless. The soda itself was sugary, doing nothing to enhance the meal. The people of Beacon had no idea what good food taste like. Certainly not the cafeteria workers.

But Emerald had no problems helping herself to my abandoned plate.

My eye twitched at her table manners. Mercury himself was eating a hamburger that was falling apart in his hands. Ketchup, grease, and shredded lettuce were dripping all over his hands. Utterly disgusting.

I stood up.

Mercury put down his hamburger and wiped his hands. "Where are you going?"

"I am going to order a pizza. You two continue observations." They both shrugged. I left them to eat their pig sty slop. Returning to my dorm, I picked up my scroll and failed the nearest pizza place. It offered an, if it isn't ready in an hour or less, it's free deal.

What I desperately needed now was a thin-crust, low-fat cheese, and chicken pizza. True huntresses do not eat pork. After placing the order, I sat on my bed and crossed my legs. They delivery directly to the dorm room. As I waited and waited, there was a nagging that I had forgotten something. Something important.

My wallet.

It's not in my pocket.

"... Emerald!" That little street rat… That little firecracker has a habit of taking it when I wasn't looking. Now I needed to find her during her observation rounds on the students of Beacon before…

_Knock. Knock._

Pizza's here…

I opened the door and said hello in the nicest voice I could muster.

"Oh hey, here's your pizza ma'am," said the blonde delivery boy. He looked awfully familiar. "Say… aren't you… that transfer student from Haven?"

Ah yes. This is Jaune Arc.

"Yes I am," I smiled as I took the pizza from him. Sliding a finger down to my uniform, I undid the first two buttons. "I am Cinder. My apologies, but you were?"

"I'm Jaune. I kind of live in the dorms down the hall. But I'm working at a pizza place to make some extra money. You know, date money to go with girls who will always reject me except in my dreams."

"Fascinating."

We stood there in silence as I undid another button. Leaning forward, I hoped the view would distract him a bit. A trick I've learned is mastery over my own body temperature. I can make my cheeks blush or flush and my chest moist or pale. "So…"

"So…?" I repeated coyly.

"Pay…?"

I stood straight up and widened my smile. "I… forgot my wallet."

Jaune sighed. "Meh, happens. Mind if I take the pizza back?" My stomach growled. "Guess not…"

"But," I said placing a finger on my lips. "However shall I pay you?"

Leaning forward again and exposing a pleasant view, I hoped his mind and eyes would wander elsewhere. Readying my posture, I was prepared to knock him unconscious and dump his body into the Beacon River. Nobody would possibly miss him and those that do… won't be alive for much longer anyways.

"Well, we have a '_your pizza's free if it isnt' delivered in under an hour_' deal. Guess I'll just say I got lost or something for another forty-five minutes," he said with a shrugged.

"Your boss is going to accept the excuse you got lost in the dorms you live in for over an hour?" I said with a head tilt.

Jaune tilted his head as well. "I'm not the smartest guy in Beacon… or person for that matter. He'll probably just take it out of my paycheck again so it's not a big deal. At least people get to enjoy their pizza, right?"

Perhaps this idiot doesn't need to die just quite yet. Mercy is something I haven't practiced in… forever.

"Come in," I said with a gesture. Walking to the desk, I placed the pizza box on my desk. "We can share this for the rest of the hour."

Jaune smiled. "Thanks. Otherwise I'd have just kept walking up and down the halls a few hundred times. Plus, I'm kind of paying for this pizza anyways right?"

"I suppose you are," I said opening the box. "First slice goes to you."

"You can take it. You're hungry. Plus I smell enough of that stuff at work. You know what they go with the day-old pizzas? They give it to us. Cold and chewy… I think I'm good."

"Of course," I said as I held the slice in a napkin. Taking a bite with a small chunk of chicken felt like heaven. "Ah, much better than the cafeteria food."

"Tell me about it. We had a food fight with it. That stuff can literally be weapons."

"Unsurprising, actually," I said taking another bite. It was after my stomach had been temporarily satisfied that I realized we were both standing. How embarrassing. "Ah, please take a seat. My bed is fine. I'm sorry I don't have much in the way of chairs."

Jaune nodded. "My dorm's the same way. But you're lucky you only have two teammates. I got three and two of them are girls. You know how much room girls need? Holy cow… oh wait. You're a girl."

I frowned. "Yes… I am…"

"You're… uh… pretty?" Jaune took fixed his pizza hat and twiddled his thumbs. "You seem pretty nice?" Me? Nice? Well, I do suppose ignorance leads to poor assumptions.

"Are you coming onto me?"

"No… I just know absolutely nothing about you. Except you're hotter than Yang."

"I'm flattered." Hm. He knows nothing about me? Well, I suppose that does make the two of us. This is an invaluable opportunity for some… information gathering.

I took a seat beside him, a slice of pizza still in hand. Before I took another bite. "So is there a particular girl you're interested in dating?"

Jaune shrugged. "I… don't she's interested in me," he said. "Might just save up my money and buy a new pair of jeans."

"Oh."

"Yeah, I mean my old ones are ripped on one knee… and besides who wears jeans into combat anyways? I could really use a combat skirt… or better yet, a combat kilt!"

Does this guy secretly want to be a girl?

"Fascinating…" I muttered.

"How about you?"

"What about me?"

"Is there someone you-"

"_No._"

The boy stiffened and his form became smaller. He was afraid of me and the air was awkward. Maybe I should let him leave and let him wander the halls for the rest of the hour. I never was good with small conversation.

"So… Cinder… say. Can I ask you something else then?"

"What?"

"Were you always this pretty?"

"What."

"What I mean is… like… are girls born pretty and stay pretty or do they go through a piggy and glasses phase before they look like you? Like… you terrify me to the bone but you're like a thirteen on a one-to-ten scale. So what I'm trying to say is… were you ever like… ugly?"

"No."

"...so real. Guess people are just born a certain way. Loser for life."

I patted him on the back. "You'll get there," I said taking another bite. He didn't seem to have any useful information on… anything other than his failing romantic pursuits.

"Thanks," he said. "I should probably get going and get chewed out by my boss some more. Man, who knew Professor Port was so tough on pizza delivery boys, right?"

He made his way to the door. I nodded as I finished my slice. "Take care. And I apologize for not paying."

"It's okay. Maybe you can go out on a date with me to make up for it."

"Okay."

Jaune stopped at the doorway, one foot out of the room. "Haha. Very funny."

"I'm serious."

"You know I was joking right?"

"Joke? What's that?" I approached him, careful in my strides and strut. I fixed his collar and adjusted his hat and patted him down of dust, flakes, and pizza crumbs. "Tell you what. Next time I order a pizza, I'll specifically request you to deliver it. And you better deliver."

"O-Okay…"

"Your boss may be kept waiting for a few hours." I leaned in closer until my lips were to his ears. "I promise I'll tip if you provide me with extra special service," I said before retreating back into my room with a smile and closing the door on him.

I turned around and pressed my back against the door. I had just committed myself to a date. I mean, I just committed myself to several hours of deep undercover information gathering.

But who said you can't find a bit of pleasure in your work?

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><p><em>Here's your Pizza Fin<em>

**Author's Notes: **_Most of my original fic ideas just come from mundane things and I roll a mental dice between: yandere, smut, WAFF, magical girl, attempted romance, or plot-less ecchi._


End file.
